The confidence we experience as we walk through the day is a multi-fasciated phenomenon. We visualize dancing, skipping and breezing from one moment to the next, but truth be told, someÂ daysÂ feel more like slugging and trudging through mud.
Sure, self-worth is a factor of knowing your value, as you read in Februaryâ€™s blog: https://whalenvoices.com/2017/02/25/self-worth-lessons-from-the-blind-men-and-an-elephant/. Your family of origin and the others youâ€™ve attracted into your lifeÂ also affect your confidenceÂ and, to some extent, help you maintain your sense of belief in yourself. See our last blog: https://whalenvoices.com/2017/03/15/do-your-peeps-give-you-confidence/.
Thereâ€™s one more foundational key in this secretÂ confidence triad: yourÂ spiritual anchor. The old saying goes, â€œThere are no atheists in foxholes.â€ When things getÂ tough, we turn to something or someone beyond ourselves andÂ the people we know. We search for a Supreme Being that will be our rock, our anchorâ€”no matter whichÂ storm rages around us.
Although Iâ€™m quite open with my deepest beliefs when speaking withÂ friends, public discussion of the spiritual side of confidence is new territory for me. Maybe itâ€™s because Iâ€™ve worked in public schools, corporations and mixed groups where (in the past) itâ€™s never been appropriate to mentionÂ the subject.
For the past two decades, as a presentation coach, I always inquired aboutÂ the client’s other-worldlyÂ beliefs in order to know just how to assist them in anchoring their confidence.Â I believe that if we want to successfully reach the core of confidence, we need to dive into this topic.
Contrary to contemporary lingo, one can be both religious and spiritual. Organized religion offers a connection to Divine strength and a treasure chest of fellowship and caring. I imagine God putting words into peopleâ€™s mouths to bless each other; dropping thoughts into our heads to comfort and heal: â€œCall Joyce today.â€ â€œTell that girl sheâ€™s wise to wait for a guy whoâ€™s worthwhile.â€ â€œTell her,’You know your mom was proud of you. She always bragged about your determination.’â€
Words read fromÂ scriptureÂ (no matter what you call your particular book)Â can make a great impact on your spirit. I recently asked a friend how her religious beliefs helped her cope with her husbandâ€™s cancer. Without missing a beat, she answered, â€œI just donâ€™t know how I could get through the day without it.â€
Church is good for many folks, and many find the Divine in nature, music and art. The presence of organic beauty reminds us that we are all one, weâ€™re all a part of the great plan. In quiet moments, comfort overtakes us; supports us, whispers to us. Signs of the Divine come through the wind, the words of a song, or the innocent question of a child.
Meditation and yoga haveÂ becomeÂ very popular with people from all walks of life, and why not? Praying is talking to God and meditation and yoga are ways toÂ listen. Isnâ€™t it about time we stopped the mind chatter, worry and fear in order to listen?
An Apache proverb tells us: â€œIt makes no difference as to the name of the God, since love is the real God of all the world.â€ And consequently, no matter how youÂ choose to experience the Divine, itâ€™s important that your belief is an unshakable anchor in your life.
The foundation of yourÂ confidence is a triad. YouÂ reach in to find worth in yourself;Â reach out to those around youÂ for comfort, support and validation; and reach up to the Divine source of life, who also speaks directly to youÂ and through others. Like a grand secret, all three keys of this triad are connected. Itâ€™s impossible toÂ separate theseÂ sources of confidence.
I like what Albert Einstein said: â€œWhen you examine the lives of the most influential people who have ever walked among us, you discover one thread that winds through them all. They have been aligned first with their spiritual nature and only then with their physical selves.â€
Confidence is multifaceted, yet, with this powerful triad of self, others and Spirit, we are able to withstand any storm. AsÂ we’re master this skill, we are able to pay it forward to others.
May your spirit soar in ways that build your confidence,