Chili Millie Blogs away: What Happens When Women Meet


When women meet, it’s a sole to soul journey.

Imagine getting together for coffee with a woman new to your network. This one-on-one meeting is a good way to hear the stories that reveal who she is and how she sees the world.

Getting to know a person is like peeling an onion. To be honest, I’ve always found that example to be a little weak because when you peel off one layer, the next layer looks just the same and that’s certainly not true about the people I’ve met,”but despite my opinion, it’s still used.

I like the pea pods analogy: We are all like pea pods walking around encased in our protective covers. When we meet, all you see is the outside, but as we take the time to get to know and trust each other, we open up, allowing our hidden uniqueness to show. 

Anyway, no matter which analogy you use, conversations normally start on the outside (the pod) because the physical part of us is right there. You might begin with: “That’s an interesting necklace. Is it your birthstone?” “I love the design on your shoes.” That’s cool how your scarf brings out the turquoise in your eyes.” We make sincere statements that spring out of what we see and what we appreciate about the “outside” of the woman in front of us. 

Some may regard these types of comments as fluffy small talk, but my friends from Avatar would say that the “I see you” statements show respect.  And even better, these observations are usually followed by responses that give clues about the inner life of the person we’re speaking with: “I got this necklace with money from the sale of my wedding ring.” “I originally bought those shoes to wear to a the Virtuosi gala.” I just had to buy that scarf because it reminded me of my grandparents’ seaside cottage in Maine. And with that, we want to know more.

What I find fascinating about women is that our stories seem to be waiting in the wings, ready to be shared with anyone who who is who wants to listen. As we share, we realize that a simple fashion choice is really a story of a relationship, or a special place, or an event, or a life changing decision. It’s an organic and unpredictable path, and yet, throughout this dynamic conversation, we move from the outside to the inside – to the soul of that person. It’s a beautiful thing. This is my take on why magic happens when women to meet.

 Jan’s goal in Season 2 of the SOLE to SOUL Workshops is to take you through that same outside to inside journey. Each session begins with a pair of shoes and a pair of movies – which are not only great fun, but also “All of life’s riddles are answered in the movies,” to quote a line from Steve Martin in the movie The Grand Canyon. Movies lead us into solving the riddles of our own stories.

What’s most exciting is that as a participant of the SOLE to SOUL workshops, you are the STAR of your own action packed adventure! And at the end of each session you’ll be uplifted, empowered and ready to share your wisdom through writing, mentoring or however creative way fits you!

Join us September 23rd (Tempe), September 26th (The Spicery in Glendale) or September 27th (on Zoom).

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